Brainmapping Results

My results were astonishing. My neurofeedback technician made it clear that these results were not a diagnosis. They are just there to show where my strengths and weaknesses are and what I’ll need to focus on during my brain training. The brain mapping technique measures brainwaves according to the different sections of your brain. My abnormal ...

13 Reasons Why Series Review (Trigger Warning and Spoiler Alert)

TRIGGER WARNING: If you are triggered by any the following topics: suicide, self-harm and/or bullying, I encourage you to take a break from reading this blog post and reach out to someone you trust to process your feelings and thoughts. If you or someone you know is struggling and/or has been feeling suicidal, do not hesitate ...

Chapter One: Fear

One of my first memories was that I have always been afraid of my father. Specifically, I can remember that one day as a young child, my mom left for work and I was inconsolable, partially because my mom has always been my buddy, but mostly because I was scared of his crazy ass. At ...

Anxious Ramblings Entry #9 – Working With My “Accommodations” (w/ voice memo)

I get nervous at the thought of other people asking about my sudden changes. I wonder if I’m being watched. I should probably always look like I’m working so that they don’t think I’m trying to take advantage. I just don’t think it’s physically okay to be overdoing things ALL-YEAR-AROUND. I’m not superwoman, and I’m ...

Anxious Ramblings Entry #8 – Meeting With Human Resources and the ADA (Final Results)

They were very careful with me…I am not sure if it was a “compassionate” careful or a “I don’t know what she might do next” careful. They started off with, “I just want you to keep in mind that the law does not require us to change the production standard if you are required to ...

Anxious Ramblings Entry #7 – Perfectionism (w/ voice memo)

Why am I such a perfectionist? I make things harder on myself than other people do. Instead of being relieved that my accommodations meeting went well (which I will post an update soon) I’m sitting in my office with the lights off and the door closed, crying my eyes out because I’m worried that people ...

Anxious Ramblings Entry #6 – Meeting With Human Resources and the ADA (Part 3)

Here I am…two days before the “official” meeting with my supervisor and our HR department, and I ask myself, “What the heck am I doing?” I went back and forth on whether I should have my husband come to the meeting as a witness and for support purposes, but my sister talked me out of it. ...

Tired of Talking

Originally posted on justanervousgirl:
Today’s topic is yet another issue plaguing my psyche. I have so many mental frays that I wonder how is it that I’ve made it this far without turning into?a lunatic. By all appearances, I look normal. I’ve been told by others who know I have social anxiety that they wouldn’t…

Anxious Ramblings Entry #5 – Taking a Toll

My throat is very tight and I am experiencing a sharp pain in my upper back and shoulders. I feel a dull headache fading in and out…I cannot tell if it is from my teeth grinding through the mouth guard I wear at night, or if it is the depression taking a toll on my body. I ...

Anxious Ramblings Entry #4 – Meeting With Human Resources and the ADA (Part 2)

My husband opened the door that led to the office of our psychiatrist and I thought silently as I sat in my chair, “Here is my time.” I just knew he was going to want to discuss the accommodations paperwork he had received from my job last week. Five seconds into entering his room, the ...

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